"Are you enjoying your summer so far?", asked the bank teller as she processed my deposit.
"Yea." I answered politely.
I saved her the long and detailed answer of how I have been enjoying my summer but not in ways I usually do.
I usually spend a week on the Delaware shore, with my family, and I haven't done that this year.
I usually allow myself a few days a week to sleep late, and I haven't done much of that, either.
I spent the better part of the last ten summers floating in my backyard pool on sunny days, but since removing the pool last year, I have done none of that.
I used to visit the library on a weekly basis, when the kids were younger, making sure to stock up on a weekly haul of books for them and me. This year? not so much.
I've enjoyed the idea of summer. Sure, I've enjoyed the relaxed schedule and lack of routine that summer always seems to offer. But, I've also watched the changing dynamic of my children's lives. My oldest began her first summer job this year and long before July ended, the younger two were already feeling the summer crunch with the arrival of fall sports workouts. I've carried in numerous college brochures with the day's mail and promised to schedule more campus visits, soon.
I've welcomed the quiet mornings, where work gets done, and kids don't wake until noon. While I simultaneously dread the day when we attempt to break that backwards sleep schedule and wake to alarms and venture off to new schools.
Gone are the days where my kids' summer fun depends on me. They've got plans and friends, and one even has a driver's license.
I've tried to avoid pining for fall and cool crisp air, as I want to enjoy what's left of summer. The problem is, I'm not sure what that means anymore.